Ten Things I Learned This Summer
When I found out that I couldn’t go to Europe this summer, Lindsay immediately jumped upon the opportunity to ask me to come to Haiti. I was on the way home from a woman’s retreat, and had to make a decision. As I prayed and asked God to speak to me on the matter, he said, “you choose;” something He frequently does with me, to my slight annoyance (which of us does not wish God would just tell us exactly what to do all the time?) and I chose Haiti. I chose Haiti over saving even more money for grad school. Unwise? Maybe. But I knew that it would be good for me.
I know what you’re thinking: Kristen, your primary motivation to go on a missions trip should not be because it is good for you; it should be to help other people. I know; but I’m being honest, that was the first thought in my mind. That it wouldn’t hurt, it would help. I could be a blessing to others; and of course I could be a blessing to one of my best friends who was leading the trip. I could trust the Lord to provide everything I needed to get there. But more than this I knew it would change me.
My first thought may seem shocking, however whenever I think of missions, I think of how missions changes the missionary, and not necessarily how the missionary changes the place they go. Of course the missionary goes in order to share the message, and to allow Jesus to work through them in bringing the kingdom of God to the environment they go to. This is what missions is for. However that is precisely the case: that God is the one that works in and through them. Our primary posture in missions should be the humility of Christ. We are not qualified to do His work, but he uses us because we are willing; and without his help we will probably harm rather than help people even when we try to do his work, like Saul trying to be a good king but listening to the voice of his people, juxtaposed with David relying always on the strength of God. I have learned this the hard way: I have loved people in my own strength rather than in God’s, and I have harmed them. I have done what I thought was right even according to Christ without his help and have done no good. Our Lord is a redeemer, and so he uses our efforts of dust and makes them beautiful; but when we listen to him and rely on his strength, we can do even more.
Let me share with you what God has taught me this summer, which has prepared me for Haiti, but has not been spoken solely in preparation for Haiti; for God teaches us how to live in his Kingdom at all times and not just in foreign countries. I hope that as you read this, you will hear the call of God to be in intimacy with him at all times, the bridegroom calling his beloved, and if he calls you anywhere other than you are, you will merely continue in fellowship with the Trinity wherever you go; for it is “not by change of place that we can come nearer to Him who is in every place, but by the cultivation of pure desires and virtuous habits” (St. Augustine). When we are willing, he uses us in his kingdom, wherever we are. These are things I learned while simply working at a coffee shop five days a week in Orange County and living a “normal” life. The things he has spoken not because I am worthy but because he loves me and I stopped a moment to listen.
1. (Everything is encompassed in this truth) You can do nothing apart from Me; you cannot bear any fruit unless you are in Me. “Unless the Lord builds the house, those who labor, labor in vain” (Psalm 127).
2. What does it mean to abide? To have a posture of listening, and be in and aware of the presence of God, which is perfect love. They asked Mother Theresa what she said when she prayed. She said, “I don’t say anything, I just listen.” Then they asked her, “What does God say to you?” She answered, “He doesn’t say anything, he just listens. If you don’t know what I mean by this, I cannot explain it to you.”
3. When we ask God to take our human love and to make it like his, and we rely on his strength while listening to what he has to say, he will do it. Often this means letting people go. The only way to gain a person is to lose them in Christ, and know that they are found in him. “Often what seems to be love is actually carnality, because it springs from natural inclination, self-will, hope of repayment, desire of gain.” -Thomas A’ Kempis
4. When we try to be good or fix ourselves for God without God himself, we fail and we get discouraged. When we stop and sit in his peace and are able to be with him, he leads us in straight paths in which we cannot stumble. His yoke is easy, and righteousness comes from God. “Commit all to God, that His will may be done and His honor be shown in His servants, for He knows well how to convert the sinful to good.” -Thomas A’ Kempis
5. Whether we live, die, suffer, or prosper, Christ is worth our love and devotion. It is all about Him. “All (people) desire to rejoice with Him, few are willing to undergo anything for His sake. Many love Jesus so long as no adversities happen to them. But those who love Jesus for Jesus’ sake bless Him in all tribulation and anguish of heart.” -Thomas A’ Kempis
6. Solitude is necessary for a life of union with Christ (imitating Him) because it is where we abide in him and listen for him.
7. Sanctification is inescapable if one desires to follow Christ, and it is not always easy. Christ does what is best for us, not what is comfortable. “It is not that we do not believe the Lord wants the best for us. It is that we wonder how painful the best will be” (C.S. Lewis).
8. The common denominator in all the saints is not their qualifications, but rather an openness and willingness to obey Christ and love him for his own sake. They know they are unable to live or accomplish anything good without him.
9. Hearing from God and being with him is simple; our problem is discontent and wanting something more of God than he has already given (which does not include the things he has promised). We would rather have the meat and garlic of slavery in Egypt than the manna that God sends from heaven on the daily. The secret of godliness is contentedness.
10. Focusing on our sin leads us away from Christ. But when we simply acknowledge it and humbly accept God’s forgiveness, asking for his help, we can move forward in the life he has called us to.
These are the things I have learned this summer, and the things I bring with me wherever I go. I am loving Jesus here in San Clemente, and I am excited to see what loving Jesus in Haiti will look like. But I know what it will not look like: it will not look like Kristen changing the world. It will look like God using what is dust and causing it to have an eternal impact. I am brought back to humility in knowing it is my privilege to go on this trip. That I will probably be much more blessed and filled up by the orphans and the people I meet than they will be blessed by me. That Christ is allowing me to have an opportunity to look into someone else’s life, and imagine what it would be like to experience what they have. The opportunity for compassion is a great blessing. The opportunity to go with a group of young people who truly love Jesus above all else is a great blessing. The opportunity to follow Christ is beyond what anyone can imagine. Pray for us, pray also for me- a sinner.
In Christ,
Kristen Rose Burnette
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